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hopes & dreams
By
Tia Ayers on
July 30, 2010
There’s too many rules in the wish business.
Throughout life, people tell you to make a wish during all sorts of occasions, but there’s always strings attached.
You can make a wish when you blow out candles, but only birthday candles (and you only get one wish no matter how many candles there are.)
What about the people [...]
Posted in hopes & dreams
| Tagged cookies, make a wish, wish
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By
Tia Ayers on
July 29, 2010
Sometimes I trick my roommates into doing my dishes by washing their dirty dishes, using them for my meal, then putting the dishes back into the sink just as I found them.
It doesn’t really save me time. I just like to pretend that I’m a princess.
Posted in hopes & dreams
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By
Tia Ayers on
July 27, 2010
Mrs. Driscoll was my first grade teacher. She was tall (about 6′2), menacing and for some reason, did not like me. She is the reason that I thought I was a bad artist for most of my childhood.
Since I sometimes drew pictures with three-fingered people instead of five-fingered people, she gave me a C in [...]
Posted in hopes & dreams, photos
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By
Tia Ayers on
July 24, 2010
You may ask, “Tia, if you were Monty Brewster and you had to spend $30 million in 30 days, what would be the first thing you’d buy?”
“Why, a 1902 first edition copy of the novel Brewster’s Millions, in which the 1985 classic film was based upon,” I’d respond.
Total price? $3.15. Only $29,999,996.85 to go.
Bet you [...]
Posted in hopes & dreams, this happened
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By
Tia Ayers on
July 18, 2010
My friend Renee asked me to go underwear shopping at The Gap. While she tried on bras in the dressing room, I sniffed Gap-brand candles and lotions.
Here’s one:
If this is what heaven smells like, I want to go to hell.
Posted in hopes & dreams, photos, this happened
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By
Tia Ayers on
July 9, 2010
The following is a transcript from my brain:
While I wait for my coffee, I might as well check out my horoscope. It’s just sitting here on the counter waiting to be read.
“Leo. With Venus in your sign, you like what you see in the mirror…”
I don’t know about liking what I see in [...]
Posted in hopes & dreams, this happened
| Tagged horoscope, Logic, Logic and Foundations, Math, Philosophy of Logic
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By
Tia Ayers on
July 3, 2010
After seeing this picture, I don’t want to be an Ultrasound Technician, but I do want to have a baby — but only if I can have one of these “snowglobe pregnancies.”
Is there anything special I have to do to be able to see my child through my pregnant skin? Prenatal vitamins? Mommy yoga? Major [...]
Posted in hopes & dreams, photos
| Tagged comics, photoshop disaster, Pregnancy, radiation, superhero, Ultrasound
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By
Tia Ayers on
June 28, 2010
If anyone needs some affection, my talking Elmo doll is here waiting for you to turn him on.
Posted in hopes & dreams, photos
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By
Tia Ayers on
June 27, 2010
Last night I had a dream that my friend, James Fritz, and I were wondering what the hell we’re doing with our lives.
I woke up exhausted.
I thought about going back to sleep and then I realized that it’s a lot easier to live than it is to dream.
Posted in friends, hopes & dreams, this happened
| Tagged dream
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By
Tia Ayers on
June 25, 2010
My friend was trying to get a job as a firefighter and asked me to write him a letter of recommendation. This is what I wrote. I wonder why he never got hired…
Dear Sir or Ma’am,
I would like to recommend NAME WITHHELD for a position in the Fire Department. I can’t think of anyone more [...]
Posted in friends, hopes & dreams
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